A Look Into Your Self-Image: Was it what you thought it was?
It all started after reading about self-image and how I feel we, as a society, spend a lot of time, effort, and resources to reinforce the importance of a high IQ, the development of talents, and plenty of other societal fascination yet not as much resources, I believe, are spent figuring out people’s self-image and what we can do to gradually learn about its significance in our lives and positively elevates its power throughout our development.
I’m personally fascinated with the self-image concept and everything that surrounds this popular topic. From my readings and study, I gathered great information and would like to share my thoughts on it. There is so much to still be learned yet I want to be part of the conversation.
Although, people can read its definition, many people, consciously or not, walk around not really understanding their self-image roots, its importance, but more importantly, its short and long-term impact on their own development.
I will not attempt to re-invent the wheel with what you are about to read below; but, I will put forward what I think can help men and women, young and old have a new perspective about themselves and HOW they can start thinking differently about themselves.
From there, each of you can change what needs to be changed and go on to have more meaningful conversations with yourself and those surrounding you.
What does self-image even means?
Well, to put it simply, it is the image that you have about yourself. Whether this image is positive or negative, it is related with how you see yourself.
The interesting thing with self-image is it continually keeps forming itself. From the time you open your eyes as a new baby to the time of your last breathe on this earth, you have the opportunity to study and see your self-image continually change.
Your self-image changes as you learn more about yourself, others, and the world that is surrounding you. Yet, at the same time, it looks for comfort and conformity. Your self-image goes on absorbing all the information and experiences and sees if it is something that appears “a good fit” within yourself, “a good place” to be and resides. Oftentimes without really realizing it, you’ll find yourself not really understanding what is going on with you, which I personally call “not knowing where your self-image is.”
What is your self-image attempting to do right now?
Let’s find out, but first, let’s look at its hierarchy for a minute.
The hierarchy of self-image: 3 levels
Level # 1
This is the highest level — at this level, you feel awesome about yourself, your abilities, your thoughts, and your actions. Basically, you’re confident and believe you belong in the world you are interacting in.
Yes you make mistakes like everyone else does but you see your mistakes and your growth differently. You’re a learner. You understand life as many corners and roads and that sometimes you’ll find yourself stuck, you’ll hear someone say not too nice things about you, you’ll miss out on a promotion, you’ll connect yourself with someone you shouldn’t have; still you know you can bounce back. As a matter of fact, not only are you aware of your bounce back powers, but you totally owning them and making sure you’re NOT devaluating yourself in the process.
At this level, you see yourself as a positive and strong contributor in your life.
Level # 2
This is the fluctuation level — at this level, you’re up and down. Sometimes, you believe in yourself and know you can achieve anything while the next week, you find yourself feeling hurt by what others have said about you. You more easily see yourself as someone who battles with the fact you know you have good qualities and talents about yourself yet you are not always able to recognize them. And when that happens, your emotions get all tangled up and everything within and around yourself start falling apart.
You find yourself believing things about yourself that are not favorable to your growth and evolution. And to make the matter worse, you don’t seem able to walk away from that feeling. As if you were glued to your own demise.
At this level, you see yourself as someone who constantly changes with the season.
Level # 3
This is the lowest level — at this level, you’re not feeling it. Actually, what you are experiencing is more like you don’t belong. In your mind, you don’t belong in this world where everyone resides, but even deeper than that, you feel as you don’t belong in your own mind. As if every conversation you’re having with yourself or with others end the same way; you’re not able to level up; you feel inadequate; you’re trapped in a no-win mindset about yourself. As if everyone is always better than you, know more than you, do better than you; which only leaves you feeling disconnected and apart from everybody else, but more importantly, apart from yourself, your IMPORTANT self.
You don’t seem able to wrap your mind around the fact you CAN think more highly of yourself. And even if this big world of yours appears open and smooth from time to time, you still don’t allow yourself to be fully absorbent of your own qualities, abilities, skills, and competencies. In this world of yours, you allow yourself to not see what and who you TRULY are. But if you do, it is not the positive vision of you that comes out, but the “lacking”, “not good enough” you that is reflected and thought of.
At this level, you allow yourself to not dig deeper and find out the treasures that are within you.
Let’s go back to my initial question — What is your self-image attempting to do right now?
You see, from what you just read, your self-image constantly evolves, stay still for a minute, and/or returns to its comfort zone. It is YOUR job to look for it, to nurture it, to talk with it and ensure it continues to go in the direction you want it to go.
Remember, we all get distracted and make mistakes yet it does not change the fact we have what it takes to see ourselves with the lenses we choose. Just make sure the lenses you select are clear and not blurred by your uncertainty, fears of yourself and/or what others may say about you.
By knowing where your self-image is at ALL TIME you’re going to avoid incongruencies that have or may have affected where you want to go. You’re going to allow yourself to see the TRUTH and not what your cluttered mind may want to see.
I will conclude with this, as you’re going to re-read this piece, be a kind judge, a fair judge of your “inner self”. See your reality for what it is at this moment and know it does not have to remain as such if you are somewhere you don’t want to be.
Give yourself grace and work on yourself. Work on yourself as you would do for anyone you TRULY care about. At the end of the day, you are not different from who you love so LOVE yourself enough to continually want to grow and learn.
