The Trickiness of Confidence
Confidence is an important and popular concept as it helps forge better versions of ourselves. However, if not understood and practiced correctly, it can quickly create overwhelming responses that could then affect our personal progression.
To better understand confidence at its core, we first have to know what we mean when we talk about confidence. According to The Merriam-Webster dictionary, confidence is defined as:
“1 A) A feeling or consciousness of one’s powers or of reliance on one’s circumstances.
1 B) Faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way.
2) The quality or state of being certain.”
From its definitions, confidence is an essential part of our growth and should remain as such so we can continue to learn and expand.
When someone has high confidence, we can oftentimes recognize it right away. They walk and talk differently. They appear very comfortable with their decisions and circumstances. They seem to feel at peace with where they are going. In reality, confident people do not appear to talk about being confident, they just are.
On the other hand, lower confident individuals demonstrate opposite characteristics. Their demeanor seems to express discomfort which often results in second-guessing their decisions. They are uncertain of their direction and are oftentimes seen using expressions such as “I don’t know, what do you think; or you decide” a lot. In fact, their belief about being successful within their situations, if present, appears to rapidly fade away.
Oftentimes, the difference between feeling confident or not is seen before or after an event or situation has occurred. For example, when you are asking yourself if you should go ahead or when you reflect on what happened and discuss how the situation was handled or could have been handled. Both scenarios prompt an overview on how you feel about yourself.
In this article, you will learn how:
1) Putting your daily life on paper can help you feel less overwhelmed which can consequently boost your confidence.
2) To strategize your day so it can assist you in feeling better, thus more confident.
3) Celebrating what was done and smiling at what wasn’t can stimulate your confidence and get you ready for the next day.
Putting your daily life on paper
As a fitness trainer, I, like many, train members in the evening. During the day, my schedule revolves around administrative tasks such as answering emails, phone calls, text messaging, sales, inventory, developing new ways to improve members’ experiences, create workouts, calculating/reading/and explaining paperwork that keep members accountable, nutrition meetings, and other details that, I feel, are important in creating a company that gives irrefutable results. All while continuing my own exercise regimen and making sure I too, continue to take care of myself.
Like the above description, being able to write what your day looks like will either feel very exciting and get you ready to tackle it or feel very overwhelming seeing everything that needs to be accomplished. If overwhelmed, then you will have to learn how to strategize it so you are no longer feeling crammed up. The goal behind putting your daily life on paper is so you can visualize yourself (with the help of others) accomplishing these tasks without prematurely putting yourself in an over exhausting mode.
However, a golden tip will be not to think everything needs to be done in one day.
Which is why strategizing your day will be KEY and the definite RULER between ending your day feeling highly confident or not.
Strategizing your day
Like many, your work often becomes your identity. In a sense, you do not seem to realize the effect it has on you, positive or negative, until later in your career. Or at least, that was my experience.
I remember days where I would stay up until 2 am reading members’ evaluation sheets or answering text messages. Despite not minding at the time, looking back, I know there were other, more efficient ways to handle it all. At the time, I did not know what I know now. I wanted to help others have an understanding of their weight gain and help them shred those pounds so they could be happy and confident. However, I miscalculated my own involvement and easily allowed myself to overextend my help, which resulted in me being available any time of the day, any day of the week, anytime of the year, which eventually started to take a toll on me.
In reality, this is the experiences of many people. You did not see it coming because you like your work or you like being involved with others. You are feeling confident in your roles, but one day, it hits you — you’re exhausted and emotionally broken down. You are telling yourself things will need to be done differently because the realization is what has worked for so long was no longer working. You have reached the end of your rope.
I want you to ask yourself — what would bring value back into my life? Is it reading, writing, jogging, lifting weights, traveling, etc. In my case, I knew I wanted to continue working out and write which meant these two things needed to have their own priority into my daily life.
You have to ensure what brings value into your life is being included into your daily life not because you have to, but because you want to.
You may have to give yourself a curfew or create new boundaries of when you are stopping certain things so you can make sure you are giving yourself the appropriate time to focus on what is bringing value back into your life. These specific tweaks can re-align what has been missing in your life or at least, make you smile for the time being because you are actually taking time for yourself, which may have not happened in a long while.
Celebrate what is done and smile at what is not
My celebration, a loud YES and a check-mark beside my accomplishments. Yet, I smile at what I was not able to finish and tell myself, tomorrow is another beautiful day to continue on my strides.
No fuss. Keep going positively. Remember, in reality, there could ALWAYS be something to work on. You can literally spend the next 12 to 18 hours working on something, but is it really “what brings value to your life”.
Chances are, your confidence is getting lower each time you are piling up your agenda and not taking moments for yourself. You may believe you are proving something to yourself or to others, but the only thing you are proving is that you are getting physically and mentally tired. If you do not take a little break, you’ll soon fall down or collapse. You want to celebrate what you did today and smile at what you were not able to do — because, whatever it was, it will still be there, undone tomorrow.
You are celebrating small victories and rewarding yourself with long bubble baths or other things you have been postponing. In other words, you are allowing yourself to feel better and “freer”.
You are making better decisions because you are not attempting to work around the clock. You are being you and paying attention to yourself and your overall well-being.
No more trickiness.
You’re deciding you’re putting your daily life on paper, strategizing your day, and celebrating what was done while smiling at what was not.
Don’t let another day, another week, or even another month pass by without you taking a serious look at where your confidence stands. Take Actions!!!